23 hours and 27 mins....

5 days

Five days until results are posted and I'm getting anxious. I had a dream last night that I got a letter saying I passed. I couldn't believe it. I hope I'm psychic though. Guess I won't know til Friday. I bet this will be the longest week ever.

aaaahhhhhh

I can't escape the bar exam!! I'm sitting in my boyfriend's house watching "Moving Up" and lo and behold one of the couples, Jeff and Daniela, have the red PMBR book sitting on their bed. Oh the insanity

20 days

The waiting game is driving me crazy. I'm spending my days searching to see what states have released their scores. One of my friends took Maryland and I checked to see if she passed but they don't release the names of the applicants, just the ID number. I don't know why it takes so long. May 23 seems so far away. I need to be studying for the NC exam but I can't focus because I'm so anxious about the Georgia results. I really hope that I passed. I love my boyfriend and hate LDRs but I've never wanted to be in an LDR so bad. That would mean that I'm Georgia bound which means I would finally be an Esquire!!

OMG

Well the results are almost in. 22 days away. May 23, 2008 will either be the most exciting day of my life or the most depressing day of my life. I try not to think about it but so many things are riding on this. I've told no one the date that the scores are released but my boyfriend keeps talking about it. My parents haven't yet, but as the month goes by it will be an ongoing question. Who knows. I want to be positive but I'm way to scorned for that.

Hanging On

I'm still hanging on...and still stressed out. I've been living with my parents since December and my welcome is officially worn out. I don't know what I'm going to do but the unanimous consensus is that I cannot stay there for much longer. My mom, who did my taxes and thus knows how much I'm getting back, is demanding that I spend my refund on a place to live. That's a fine idea but what happens when the money runs out? I still am doing contract work which means I never know when I'm going to be working. I want to take time off for the bar as well. My boyfriend offered to let me stay with him for a while so that I can afford to buy a car. My mom is 100% against that idea. It's like I can't win. I turned 27 last week and am still living by other people's rules. From a purely financial POV, living with my BF would be an excellent idea. From a peace of mind POV, it would be great and awful. My mom would talk so much crap about me living with him and I fear that if I needed financial assistance, my parents would tell me to go ask my BF since I want to "play house." Also, I know we'd fight some and I couldn't go running back to my parents' house. However, I know that my mind would be at ease b/c I would get to see him everyday and some of the financial burdens would disappear. Don't know what I'm going to do but when I find out, I'll let you know.

I don't need sympathy

The purpose of this blog is not to seek sympathy. This is actually a sort of therapy for me. I do find it ironic, however, that people tell me to drop my boyfriend b/c he doesn't fully support me in my constant retaking of the bar yet these strangers are telling me to pull myself up by the bootstraps and get over it...oh yeah, and take some medication. Thanks!

Anyway, I got a second job this week. I'm pulling documents from the courthouse for Thomson West. I also just started a new Doc. Review project. I need funds fast so I can get out of my parents' house b/c my mom is on my last nerve. I also need to pay for BarBri. I also applied for another Doc. Review job that pays more and is only PT. I hope I get that job so I can quit working for this temp agency.